You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
