how hairy? two words: wookie tits
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Randomize
