More tranny stories later!
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
