Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize