Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
