The maid of honor just puked.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
