New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
