There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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