This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize