Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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