Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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