I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize