There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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