The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
