a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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