I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I think your dad took our porno
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
