i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
