well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
