I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
she told me i tasted like america
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
