I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
