I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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