Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
