she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
