i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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