I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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