It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
