Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
