I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize