Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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