I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Randomize