HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i used baking grease as lip gloss
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
