you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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