Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
This is my gift to your gina
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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