that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
