i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
my shit smells like andre
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize