That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
