I got chris browned last night
look no pants
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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