I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize