Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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