Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
