try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
how does that bad decision feel?
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
