just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
