i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
