No, drunk sperm still make babies.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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