Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Randomize