So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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