you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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