cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
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