The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize