Nicole vs. Life
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize