i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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